The Community

Empathy has never been a problem for me.  I feel things deeply – for myself and for others.  I have never feared sitting in someone else’s darkness with them, and believe me, I will sob right along with you when you are sad.

It makes this heart life hard sometimes.  I have literally sobbed for diagnoses and deaths of children I have never met in real life before.  I follow along with stories and some of these kids – and their families – become really important to me.

It’s all personal.

I have followed a story of a little boy with the same heart diagnoses (Tetralogy of Fallot, Pulmonary Atresia, and MAPCAs) as Kiran for a few years now.  And today, his family has basically found out he will die in the near future, due to the severity and uniqueness of his MAPCAs and pressures.

I don’t know the whole story, and I don’t have to.  I sit here now, and I cry with this news.  I cry because I hurt for this mama, even as I can’t imagine what that must be like to hear.  I cry because of the very real fear and the knowledge that I am more prepared to hear this kind of news than most.  I cry because of the uncertainty of these heart conditions, and I cry because of the uncertainty of life in general.

I know it’s not just those of us living the heart life that deal with this pain and this loss.

It has been at the forefront of my thinking lately, as it seems so many in my world are dealing with such tragedy, such horrible and scary diagnoses, such pain, such loss.

And there is nothing I can do.  But I will cry.  For you, with you, every time.

You can count on me to cry.


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