Today, I am angry.  I am scared.  I read an article this morning about how hospitals in the U.S. in the hardest hit areas are already overloaded.  In New York, no room in the morgue, so bodies are being held in refrigerated trucks.

Are you taking this seriously yet?

I can no longer breathe through that fear and tell myself it won’t happen here.  In our country.  In my state.  Because it’s happening in our country, and my state, in my opinion, isn’t taking it seriously enough.  And personal responsibility is largely lacking in our society as it is.

I told you I was angry today.

My biggest fear, I will share again.  It will hit our area hard, and our hospitals will be beyond capacity.  Life and death decisions – who to save, who to not save – will have to be made by medical standards.  One glance at Kiran’s medical history, I fear that if my son catches this or anything else and needs respiratory support, I will get a “sorry” ….

And I will have to bring my son home to die.

Even I thought that was an irrational fear when I first shared it – what – a week ago?  I keep watching the irrational become more and more probable, and I am angry.


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