An article.  A group text conversation.  Two experiences today have led me to think about my long-touted theory of what it’s like to love.

I wrote about this in my college blog – I did not realize then how spot on I was.  College was a long time ago, and life experience has shown that I was wise beyond my years….

Loving someone amplifies every emotion, both positive and negative.  I think it is why so many find it difficult to love – that kind of vulnerability isn’t easy.  I also think it is why so many relationships fall apart – and no, I have no room to talk here – because people simply aren’t ready for the negative emotions to also come at them with greater force and depth.

I am not simply talking about romantic love here.  It is the yin and the yang of all love.

The strongest, greatest love I have ever experienced in my life is the love I have for my son.  The greatest love – the greatest sense of loss.  The greatest peace – the greatest fear.  The greatest moments of absolute joy – the lowest moments of absolute despair.  The greatest living – the greatest grieving.  It is all inside this life we live; this love we receive and give.

Experiencing the loss of my brother through death has given me a deeper appreciation of life.  Experiencing the difficulties with Kiran has given me a deeper appreciation for the successes we have.

For crying – my latest blog entry was in celebration of a few swallows of water!  Who knew my joy could come from such a small success…but when you deal with the daily challenges of a child who can’t safely and successfully eat….

I have always, always, said it is worth it, to love.  Go back and read the very first entry I ever wrote in this blog.

In order to experience love, joy, peace, life….we must also embrace the flip side of those things.  I am thankful my experiences have given me depth on the positives.  I wouldn’t give it up for anything.  It IS worth it.