An article. A group text conversation. Two experiences today have led me to think about my long-touted theory of what it’s like to love.
I wrote about this in my college blog – I did not realize then how spot on I was. College was a long time ago, and life experience has shown that I was wise beyond my years….
Loving someone amplifies every emotion, both positive and negative. I think it is why so many find it difficult to love – that kind of vulnerability isn’t easy. I also think it is why so many relationships fall apart – and no, I have no room to talk here – because people simply aren’t ready for the negative emotions to also come at them with greater force and depth.
I am not simply talking about romantic love here. It is the yin and the yang of all love.
The strongest, greatest love I have ever experienced in my life is the love I have for my son. The greatest love – the greatest sense of loss. The greatest peace – the greatest fear. The greatest moments of absolute joy – the lowest moments of absolute despair. The greatest living – the greatest grieving. It is all inside this life we live; this love we receive and give.
Experiencing the loss of my brother through death has given me a deeper appreciation of life. Experiencing the difficulties with Kiran has given me a deeper appreciation for the successes we have.
For crying – my latest blog entry was in celebration of a few swallows of water! Who knew my joy could come from such a small success…but when you deal with the daily challenges of a child who can’t safely and successfully eat….
I have always, always, said it is worth it, to love. Go back and read the very first entry I ever wrote in this blog.
In order to experience love, joy, peace, life….we must also embrace the flip side of those things. I am thankful my experiences have given me depth on the positives. I wouldn’t give it up for anything. It IS worth it.