I feel like it has been a pretty intense week.  I am processing a lot of things related to Kiran’s care and some of the answers and new paths 2018 may bring for him.  For us.

Kiran was offered and we accepted a spot in the cage starting February 27th.  We debated, along with his physical therapist, about waiting until the fall – in order to give him more time to master standing so we could focus on more movement while in the cage – but ultimately, we wanted to move forward with this session.  We have so many moving parts in our life with the changes in our family, and we knew we could commit to this session.  So we did.  It will be 8 weeks, 3 days a week, for 1 hour a day.  We set some good goals for our time in the cage, and we are very excited to have this opportunity again!

We got our assessment scheduled at the Center for Disabilities and Development for April 27th.  This will be a 4 hour ordeal, with a medical professional, speech pathologist, physical therapist, occupational therapist, social worker, and audiologist.  It is called a “Neurodevelopmental Clinic”.

Neurodevelopmental.  My thoughts keep moving back to the MRI.  I am finally ready for whatever information it may hold for us, and it is very difficult to wait until May.  I had a frank conversation with a friend about it the other night, and Kiran’s feeding therapist asked if we had scheduled it today.  When I questioned why she had asked – if she had any concerns – she quickly assured me she didn’t…but then said it would just be interesting if there were any abnormalities around the feeding parts of the brain…but then again quickly said she was just curious.

I don’t think it was just curiosity.  I get the sense a lot of his medical and therapy providers are starting to wonder if there is more to his story than we know now.  And the more time passes, the more I start to wonder, too.

So.  I’m processing.  I’m processing fears and emotions, possible scenarios….

I think I am far more equipped for whatever it tells us now than I would have been had we done it any sooner.  So even though I sometimes berate myself for not having done a brain MRI as an infant or in the last year….I remember this.  I wasn’t ready then.  I’m ready now.

It’s the waiting until May that may drive me crazy.